The day before I found out I was to become a father, there was a chance I could lose my wife.
She said she was having extremely bad pains in her lower abdomen.
It took some time to set in as to what was happening, because there was a lot of speculation, but nothing confirmed one way or the other.
The night before she took a pregnancy test that would determine if this was just a series of really bad pains, but nothing serious; if this could mean the end of her life, or if she was fast enough, just the end of a failed pregnancy.
I couldn’t really react, what do you say to someone who may not live through the week? Who may lose the one chance they had at having children?
So she went in and got an ultrasound, they found nothing in her tubes, and did some blood work. So disaster averted.
The tests came back and confirmed she was pregnant.
I was finally able to start processing.
In the days since, I’ve felt terror like I never have had before. How will we provide? This is the first time in my life that I will be completely responsible for someone else to survive, their future. Until they can provide for themselves, they are completely dependent on me (well , us).
It also filled me with unbelievable energy and enthusiasm. I feel like I have more energy now than I ever had in my whole life, but nowhere to point it.

We’ll just have to see how this goes!